It’s been in the papers and on TV. It's on Facebook and Twitter. The one place it isn't in yet, and the place it should never be is in a court of law. In case you don't already know, Hansen Beverage Company, owner of Monster Energy Drink, has told Vermont microbrewery Rock Art to "cease and desist" their production of Vermontser beer. They claim it's a trademark infringement on their energy drink and that it may confuse customers.
I don't drink Monster Energy Drink and can't vouch for the intelligence or stupidity of those who do, but if Pepsi said that Mountain Dew drinkers might confuse their product with Mountain Spew Malt Liquor I would take that as a personal insult. Just how stupid do you think your consumers are, Hansen? Wait! Don't answer that. You're in deep enough as it is. Let’s consider a few more possibilities first...
Hansen may be planning their own line of beers, each with their own catchy title like FreeMonster, BelMonster and AlabaMonster. It would follow that Vermonster would fit nicely into that lineup. However, I don't think Hansen has any trademark of these particular names.
Maybe Hansen is trying to preemptively protect all variations on the word Monster for any product line it can think of. If this is the case, they have a lot of work to do especially around Halloween for the several iterations of Monster Mash, which would be confusing to those seeking Monster version of whiskey. Monster Truck competitions could be confused with their NASCAR sponsorship. What about the Lake Monsters, the Minor League baseball team in Vermont. MonsterNation could be the banner they choose for their nation building brand of privately owned security forces. Countless childrens books would have to be revised, costing millions of dollars and wasting tons of paper.
Most likely, the Hansen Beverage Company has not thought this one through thoroughly enough, and they just need some help with their public relations and consumer affairs. So, if you are reading this at Hansen, here is your help: Reverse your position and offer to "help the little guy" with distribution. You could get a nice chunk of the commission and look good in the process. You could help a small business grow in hard economic times and look like a hero.
The public's displeasure with Hansen's heavy handed tactics is quickly growing beyond Vermont. The path they are on is not leading to anything good for them or anyone else. Hansen, Call off your lawyers before you make a MonsterAsshole out of yourself.
